Hey yoooooo!!!!
So I have got through a week of effectively being a single parent (for new readers my hubs has been away for work). I apologise firstly, for the amount of moaning and over thinking I have likely done over this week. This blog has definitely been used as a coping mecanism. I don’t find it easy to share what’s going on for me in the moment so I wrote it down. I have always found it easier to write than to talk my feelings… which is weird as I love to talk about everything else!
This week has been everything I didn’t expect. What I expected was that it would be the early mornings plus night time sleep interuptions from Isobel that would be the hardest thing. I was also really concerned about my fibrolyalgia kicking off and many scenarios played out in my paranoid mind box. Obviously missing my equal half was also a concern… although, I knew we could manage that from being away from him when Mum died.
I am not going to try and claim that it has been plain sailing as my previous blog posts will prove me to be a liar… but looking back over the week I am proud of how it has gone over all. The tricky bits have mostly been low energy and not being able to drive. Not having the back up with everything has been missed and I have struggled to take care of my health both physical and mental over this week. That being said… I haven’t taken it out on anyone else (which is my natural instinct for some reason). I haven’t been asking for help other than the occasional asking one son to go tell other son that dinner is ready or to take the bin out for me. I’ve mostly carried on walking the dog myself and all my normal household jobs have been done, plus a lot of the hubs jobs, plus quite a lot of organising and sorting (I am currently on a mission to de clutter and make the house more of a home). [book recommendation: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo]
I am going to put it out there that the things that society dictates are not really work in terms of raising a family and taking care of home is in my opinion a bunch of bull shirt. I find it difficult. I also find that it’s the best part of my life in terms of my little family are everything and give me purpose when I don’t always think of myself as a worthwhile human. I just have to look at my kids and my hubs to know that I must be pretty cool to have these humans calling my Mum or wife. This is how I fake it til I make it!
One of the many things I learnt from my Mum was to utilise To Do lists. Now my way of using them has been adapted by merging a few different techniques I acquired from others.
Number 1… I have a master To Do list. This is a lined notebook that I literally brain dump everything as I think of it. The list is not in any order as I am way to scatty to think of things in a logical order straight up.
Number 2… From there I have my planner. Each day has a double page spread and I pick my 3-4 things from the master list. I also note a quote of the day; what I plan on eating; shopping list for that day if necessary; expenses; exercise; my water intake; self care plan; and there is a space for random notes. Once a week I will incude a priority to do list for the week. This will focus on bigger tasks that may need breaking down over the week into more manageable chunks.
Number 3… Regular jobs get put straight into the calendar on my phone and on Mondays I calendar block for the week. This gives me an idea of what and how much I am aiming to get done that week. However, if I am having a high stress time the calendar blocking can be dropped as I find that my phone pinging me all day can be jarring if I am not feeling focused.
Number 4… I have list book (from paperchase) that I use for meal planning and shopping lists. It has little tags in it too that I can use to mark the recipes I (or the hubs) is going to use.
It might seem like a lot but it’s what works for me. I can look at a glance what I need to do today without the overwhelming master list either panicking me because I can see how much I want to achieve or its floating around in my brain taunting me and slowing me down even more. It’s part of my morning routine to set myself up for the day and I’ll admit it is something I look forward to. It helps me get excited for the day ahead.
I’d love to hear how you organise your time or what you might try from my routine! comment below or email [email protected]