Heyy yoooo!!
It is day 3 without the hubs. We facetimed today which was great but I never facetime people usually… Just Mum. I would say I am doing ok generally. I am starting to feel happiness again. She is still constantly in the back of my mind and everything I do seems to have a connection to the loss of her. I find it really difficult to explain. I am thankful that not every waking moment takes my breath away with grief anymore but there are still moments, like seeing a facetime that isn’t her face, that do wind me slightly. I thought about her a lot today. I am thankful for the time I had with her and I am trying really hard to not focus on the things that a) I can’t change and b) make me really sad. Will that ever be second nature?
One of my go to songs when I sing my praises at the moment is Gracefully Broken (Matt Redman)… I really identify with it at the moment. Here’s a quote that particularly rises the power in my belly…
Your power at work in me
I’m broken gracefully
I’m strong when I am weak
I will be Free
I am at least feeling the Grace now… I am so blessed!
So today I was in need of a chill day. I was planning to go to Bedworth and take Little Miss to the park but I am going into town tomorrow instead and meeting a friend.
The 4 things I made sure I got done were…
- Cleaning the bathroom
- wash the remainder of the washing and put everything away
- post a few of the items I am getting rid of online to sell
- This blog post
I also managed to find time to remove the nails I had on that were well passed sell by. I currently have naked nails for the first time since I was pregnant I think. I sorted a bit more out in Isobels room too. I’m determined to get this house straightened out.
I started reading Friend Request by Laura Marshall last night. It seems like it will be alright so far but I have only read the first couple of chapters so far. Will let y’all know what I think of it when I have done with it.
Good night & God Bless xx